Make Me Who I’m To Be. Today.

It’s late. Way too late. This has nothing to do with the songs post (or maybe it does….), but, my mind is going. Fast. Therefore, thoughts need to escape the institution that my mind can be. I’m thinking about two things. Who I am. And who I want to be. I see these two people… they look the same to some people. They maybe even talk the same and heck, wear the same clothes. But, really, they are pretty different. I’m not as committed as I want to be. I’m not as in love with God and His commands as I want to be. I’m not a person who stands up for what is right, all the time. I’m not, I’m not, I’m not…..

And here’s the thing. I was thinking about who I’m not and also what it would look like to see the “not” changed to “am”, and a funny thought struck my heart/mind. “What if…. I’m… not ready… to be the person I want to be…???” Hmmm…. Am I? Am I not?

I feel like I’m so quick to point out my flaws. Then, the next day (or even the next hour), I’m so quick to point out all the amazing things I’ve done. Am I ever happy? Or, on the other hand, am I ever not ok? I feel like my mind is in a constant struggle to figure out who I am and why I’m not who I want to be. And I know that in this I am not alone. I’ve said it before, but, we live in a culture that is SO quick to point out the bad in everything that we almost always miss what is good. We see a movie and it’s good, but I didn’t like the ending. Or we get a new CD and I love this artist but the second to last song was horrible. etc. etc. But when do we ever look at something, as horrible as the situation may be, and think about the good happening? Or the good to come? Ever?

Anyway…. “What if I’m not ready?” I think that I want to see myself become this great thing. And I want it today. But God is watching me live my life and knows that I can’t be “D” without “A”, “B” and “C” happening first. And not to say that it’s a formula on how to become Godly, cuz it’s not. But, I do know that there are steps that need to be taken to get to a certain place. We can never just arrive one day and look back and see no work being done to get there. There must be a process, and, more importantly, I think, there must be faithfulness to that process. Commitment to the process. Even a love for the process that God has me going through in my life.

So here in my challenge. To love where God has you RIGHT NOW. To see the next step that HE wants you to take and take it. Know that we must follow His process if anything fruitful is ever going to happen. And allow God to, day by day, make us into the people He created us to be. Don’t get down on one bad day. Don’t give up if we don’t see results. But press into God and give Him the praise that belongs to Him.

Striving to be more of who I’m to be today,

Morgan

V-Necks, Faux-Hawks and Ukuleles (An Update)

The last time I blogged was 2 days after I turned 21. Hm… that sure seems like forever ago. Man, so much has happened. I feel like I need a nap right now, but maybe this is a little more beneficial. Who knows.

Basically I feel like I need to post an update on my life. Not just for the 2 people who ever read this, but more (is this selfish?) for me. I think it’s good, and very healthy to remind yourself why you do what you do, or why you are where you are. So what do I do? Where am I and why?

God told me quite specifically in December to not go back to Colorado Springs for DLA 2nd year. I wasn’t very happy with God at that moment. But more than I was unhappy, I still trusted in His plan for me, whatever that was. It was pretty unclear at the time. But since then, God has been faithful (is He ever not?) and showed me more than I could’ve dreamed. I’ve been plugged in to Fusion, our churches youth group, for quite some time. I never thought a whole lot about it, just a place to serve, but over the last year and a half God has really given me a heart for those kids. To see them come to know Jesus in a real way and to help them walk out a life committed to God. So I continued to serve in JV Fusion by leading worship and leading a small group, then I started to serve in Varsity Fusion as well. They are two totally different beasts, and I love different aspects about both. I’ve recently added a bass and electric guitar to my JV worship ministry. Nate and Chris have been committed to this thing and I love them for it. Also, Rachel, another high schooler, jumped in on it and is singing with me. Those three are all so incredible. I love their hearts and being able to pour into them. I’ve also been meeting with Andy on a weekly basis, just talking over youth the last week and what can change and what we can do better. That’s been awesome. It’s been a great opportunity to learn from him. He really has a heart for what he does, and every week I catch a little more of that heart. I’m so blessed to be a part of the decision making process for Fusion.

God has really been stirring the idea of leading worship in me lately. I never saw it coming, but it has. It’s become a passion. I’ve been sitting down with Adam and three other guys once a week as part of a “worship leader training” class, or something like that. Adam is basically teaching us what he has learned over the years and how to effectively lead worship in an Element Church setting. I’ve loved sitting underneath him and learning from his experience. I think it’s really preparing me for something in the future, as well as making me a better worship leader today. Love it!

I’m stilling playing bass for the worship team almost every Sunday morning. It’s great. I’ve really grown in my musicianship and I’ve loved being a part of this ministry. Sunday mornings are always so special. People coming to know Christ and others worshipping Him so passionately. It’s a great thing to be a part of. It really is.

I’ve really been thinking back on my roots in this church. What got me involved and what was I a part of? It’s amazing to see Fusion come where it has. It’s amazing to see Sunday mornings come where they have. But the one that gets me every time is thinking back on the beginning days of theSHIFT and seeing where it is now. Wow… Curtis is leaving soon. That’s one of the hardest pills I’ll have to swallow in the near future. I don’t really know what to think. But I’ve become more and more at ease with it in even the last week. I’m going to miss Curtis, as a friend, like I think not a lot of people understand. Curtis was my bro. Still is. But I mean, for a long time we were the ones casting vision for this thing, and then others jumped on board (by the grace of God alone), but I was Curtis’s guy. Man…. 🙂 But now, to see Bruce taking on the leadership position in theSHIFT and to see God give him vision like he has is incredible. theSHIFT is going places, and I’m so glad that I get to be a part of it. And I’m glad that Bruce is the one that is taking charge or leading or whatever you wanna call it. He is God’s man for this job at this time. But being in theFamily has been great. A true community, unlike anything I think a lot of people ever get to be a part of. I’m just lucky that I’ve been a part of two absolutely incredible communities in just the last two years. Schanyway… I’ve loved being able to lead worship for theSHIFT, whenever they need it, as well. We don’t do worship regularly, just at our monthly prayer meetings and probably a few random times in between. But it’s been a great growing opportunity for me, and I’m glad that I get the privilege of doing that for them.

Don’t really know what’s next for me. But I’m really trying to be all here in this season of life. I’m in Cheyenne until God tells me differently. Wonder when that will be? 🙂

Ahh… that was good. Always good to put thoughts on ‘paper’.

I wonder if I’ll always struggle with making complete thoughts…,

Morgan

PS. I bought a Ukulele! So stinking fun!

The Challenge of Consecration

As part of the Desperation Vow (HERE) Consecrated Heart is a tough thing. The word consecration brings up a lot of confusion or negative thoughts. We don’t know what it means, or we kinda know and it just doesn’t sound “fun”. Or we totally know, but it is just so hard that we give up trying. Heck, I don’t even know exactly what the word means, but I know enough to know if I’m being consecrated or not, and that, sometimes, is what matters.

Something that David Perkins said about consecration at Desperation Conference this last year is that: “Consecration isn’t about all of the “no’s”, but about the one, all-consuming ‘yes'”. Basically, being consecrated isn’t about everything that we can’t do, but about having Jesus and allowing Him to be an all-consuming component in our lives. He is in all things and He is working in all parts of our lives. C.S. Lewis said something that I think sums this up quite well. “If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the best explanation is that I was made for another world”. That is consecration. That the desires of this world don’t mean anything to us in light of the great things to come.

The challenge with this is that we sometimes don’t want it.

John 3:16-21

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son,that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son. This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God.”

Either we want our darkness, or the people around us want their darkness and persuade us to want our darkness. But as we all know, the best place to be is in the arms of God, submissive to Him and listening to every word he speaks to us.

James 4:7-8

Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

The above is largely an incomplete thought. Just what was on my mind right now,

Morgan

Love, Love & Love

As one dives deeper into culture and as one dives deeper into God, quite peculiarly, you find that they have one thing in common. Love. This one thing is viewed completely different by each, but is where a lot of people find their meaning.

When you listen to the radio, or watch movies, or anything like that; how often do we seen love as a central theme. Everyone, guy or girl, enjoys a good love story. I would say close to, if not more than, half of all songs are written about love in some way. Whether it is about broken love, new found love, pure true love, or ungodly love; love surrounds us. And we love to love it. 🙂

The same is with God, but in a much more real sense. When we dive into the person of God and see who Jesus really was, we see that He was  a man who loved people. Plain and simple. He showed His love by eating with the sinners, healing many, and “God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8). And some of my single greatest “God-moments” come from when I am praying and understand, or get a revelation of, God’s unfathomable love.

What is different from the world’s love and God’s love, is that the world’s love is small, conditional and fickle, while God’s love is unconditional, faithful and “I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God” (Ephesians 3:17-19).

I’m amazed to see these two forces fighting for my affections in my life. The world’s love looks so good at first, doesn’t it? It calls to us, inviting us into her house like  the woman in Proverbs 7. It seems nice, but we know that following that ‘love’ is like putting our own neck in the noose or going to our own slaughter.

But God’s love, a love that is hard to grasp at times, is so big and amazing that sometimes it’s hard to fathom. It’s hard to know His love at first, but once we catch a glimpse of it, we truly are never the same (not just cuz Kim Walker says we are, we really are never the same).  It is God’s love that sent His son to us to be a sacrifice for our many sins and it is God’s love that enables us to live lives worthy of Christ. God’s love is what makes all things new, and once we grasp this love we are able to pour that love back into others. And that is when we are truly able to impact people for the Kingdom of God.

So I pray that wherever we are, we are able to walk with God and walk in His love. We will never be the same.

Loved and Loving,

Morgan

Crush The Idols!

Crush those idols, burn it and make those suckers drink it! This was posted on David Perkins’ blog. Good stuff.

I Put My Trust In ______…

1557811-Repelling-down-the-Mountain-0I’ve had quite a few conversations with people this last few months. Some have lost their ‘steady’ jobs, some have lost certainty of their future, some have lost relationships, some are just loosing focus, or just loosing grip. Lives aren’t necessarily falling apart, but people are loosing things that were going really well, including myself, and having to find a solid foundation.

Out of all the conversations I had, one thing rang through all of them, that these people that I know, my friends and family, have decided that even in all of this, they will put their trust in God and Got alone. I’ve had to put my trust back in God. I’ve had to come back to a place where God is my everything. We are so quick to put our identity in what we are a part of or what we are doing, but God is it. God is our identity. Coming to a place of prayer and love where we can connect with God again, as we used to, and truly love Him with our lives.

So thank you friends. Thank you family. For showing me how to put my life back in God’s hands and trust that He will hold me forever. For helping me find my identity in God again and for loving me through it. You make my life so much better.

Humble or Be Humbled

guitar

The last two weeks I’ve been leading worship for JV Fusion, our Junior High youth group here at Element Church. I led before I left for Colorado Springs, and I’m going to be leading for the next few months that I’m home. The first week I led it was incredible. Not that I was amazing or anything, but the response from the kids was awesome. I really feel like this year is going to be a breakthrough in worship and spiritual growth in JV and Varsity. I’m so excited about it.

This last Wednesday we were about 15-20 minutes from the start of service and I was sort of pacing around the place, praying. Praying for the night, praying for God to touch lives and for people to be transformed. Then I started thinking about the pride I’d let build in my heart about being the worship leader. I’m the ‘cool guy’ around here, right? Ya….. So the last thing I prayed was: “God, humble me”. Simple. Effective. I was thinking, ‘God just help me not to have such a big head in leading. I want to do really well for you tonight’. Of course I want to do well ‘for God’, but did I really mean it?

So we started the night with a game and then I was up. Started off with a jump-jump song. Heh. The kids like those ones. Then did a few more “serious” songs. During these my guitar went out of tune and I started singing really weird. So I finished up and I prayed and left the stage. I remember thinking of how horrible it went. I didn’t want to talk to anyone about it. So we finished the night and I left pretty quickly. Just kinda wanted to get home and enjoy the company of some people. So I got home and soon after Andy gave me a call. He told me he didn’t catch me before I left, but wanted to tell me that I did an amazing job tonight and he thought the kids responded really well. Thinking back, I also remember that the kids were responding to the worship really well. I thanked him…

…then it hit me. I’m not there to lead worship for myself. Yes, if I’m worshipping it makes it that much easier for the kids, but that’s not the reason for me leading. I’m leading for the kids. I’m leading them into the presence of God, and allowing Him to touch their lives. I’m creating an environment where the students can meet God, and God and draw near to them. Yes, there are times when I mess up a lyric or play the wrong chords, but if I let those things ruin my meeting with God, and ruin the kid’s meeting with God, I’ve failed. My number one goal is to first create an environment where God feels more real than ever, and to second be an example of a worshipper.

When I realized this, everything changed, and it humbled me. Then I remembered what I prayed, “God, humble me”. Hm… He sure did. Why am I leading worship? Why do I care about it so much? What is my attitude going in and afterwards? What does leading worship truly mean? How do lead worship and not have a big head about it? Glenn Packiam has a great blog about some of these ideas HERE. Check it!

Humbled and being humbled,

Morgan


About This Blog

This blog is the personal thoughts and musings of Morgan Clark. If you wish to understand some of what is going on, I encourage you to read my first post. You can read it HERE
Enjoy this, and by all means, don't take me too seriously. You'll just have to figure out when I'm being serious and when I'm not. haha. It's a game in itself.

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    Hi everyone! Apologies for an absence in updates; maybe that would be a good New Years resolution! As a brief update on the Shift; we've had amazing attendance and community surrounding the Shift for the past several months! So exciting to see young people coming together to learn about Christ and seek Christian fellowship with one another. New people a […]
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